Thursday, September 12, 2013

*wrench*



this book!
this book is ripping my heart out. 

i'm a little over 1/2 way through, and i am sort wishing i'd taken the whole day off tomorrow instead of just the afternoon, because i want to stay up all night until i finish the book.  and then i know i'll be chomping at the bit for the sequel (MINE).  agh!

i don't normally like angsty books.  i get seriously irritated.  i tend to not even read them if a review says they're angsty, or hints that it's a big part of the storyline.  idk if no one mentioned it in the reviews of this story, or if the premise was just too tempting to resist, but i'm GLAD that i'm reading it.  it's ... well, i was getting super annoyed w/ it there for a bit.  brooke's one track mind full of lust is seriously a little bit unnerving.  i mean, i'm all for objects of desire & everything, but she's a little over the edge!  
but then, she finally gets remy to open up a little, and i was already swooning over his control and his not wanting to give in to her (cuz he's a guy, and who does that?), and then ... full on major swoon factor going on!  
*sigh*

in other, non-book news of the day... 
my friend linda is retired, but has a baking business of sorts, and she makes DIVINE cupcakes & cakes, and i ordered a lemon berry cake.  it was small, but still didn't want to take the whole thing home & devour it (obvs), so i shared w/ my team at work.  : )   

i had a little blurb about daddy i was going to share, but i posted that on fb instead, so i will just say that right now i'm struggling w/ some things, and am very thankful for my friends & family & co-workers.  your words of encouragement really help me.  i still struggle, and things are still hard some days.  but knowing that i can SAY that, and that y'all will understand & send me prayers & words & support... it means a lot, and i'm very very blessed.  so, thank you!!

and i know i chatter on about my books, and that some books (like this one) i share a lot of as i'm reading them, but they help, too.  especially when they make me laugh and make my heart swell, but even when they make me cry.  they offer an emotional outlet that i don't get elsewhere.  my co-workers are all married (or soon to be so) and often share stories about their husbands, and a couple of them are expecting, and some days ...  i can't finish that thought.  anyway.  i'm happy for them, and i like hearing about their families.  

music is another favorite outlet, and i know recently i've been semi-promoting five finger death punch.  their new album has GREATLY helped me a lot recently (along w/ the usual shinedown, yanni, three days grace, phil collins, etc...).  two of my favorite songs on the new album, M.I.N.E. and Watch You Bleed i just keep playing over & over again.  (yes, there's swearing in the 2nd one.)(also, the 2nd one seems really violent, but ... idk, it's almost mournful, and it just makes me feel better.)(i think you should see if you can listen to them online, so you can hear the music w/ the lyrics & maybe enjoy them, too!)  : ) 

"M.I.N.E (End This Way)"
Everybody hurts
Everybody bleeds
Everybody bends to fill a need
Everybody's born with their own curse
And I'm not alone

Everybody cries
Everybody breaths
Everybody wants to feel they're free
Deep inside I know what I am worth
A life of my own

It could have been much worse
But it should have been better

I know I'd hurt you, deserted you
And now I see it clear
I pulled you closer, tighter
'Cause I knew you'd disappear

I just can't compromise, apologize
There's nothing you can say
We both knew
It would always end this way

Everybody pains
Everybody grieves
Everybody's making off like thieves
Every soul's aching for release
You're not alone

Everybody lives
Everybody leaves
Everybody begs best on their knees
Everybody's got the same disease
No one's alone

It could have been much worse
But it should have been better

I know I'd hurt you, deserted you
And now I see it clear
I pulled you closer, tighter
'Cause I knew you'd disappear

I just can't compromise, apologize
There's nothing you can say
We both know
It would always end this way

Knew it'd end this way
We knew it'd end this way

I know I'd hurt you, deserted you
And now I see it clear
I pulled you closer, tighter
'Cause I knew you'd disappear

I just can't compromise, apologize
There's nothing you can say
We both knew
It would always end this way

"Watch You Bleed"

I'd give anything just to cut you free.
I'd give blood just to watch you,
(Just to watch you) BLEED!

I see through you and all your lies.
You are everything that I despise.
You won’t take shit when you leave.
What the hell do you want from me?

I'm over it, so over it, this is goodbye!
I'd give anything just to cut you free.
I'd give blood just to make you,
Just to watch you BLEED!

I know you better then you do.
I'm to ** blame, so are you.
It won’t kill me to watch you leave.
What the ** do you want from me?

I'm over it, so over it, this is goodbye.
I'd give anything just to cut you free.
I'd give blood just to make you,
Just to watch you BLEED!

(Just to make you, Just to watch you)
(Just to make you, Just to watch you)
BLEED

I'd give anything, just to cut you free.
I'd give blood, just to make you,
Just to watch you BLEED!

I'd give anything, just to cut you free.
I'd give blood, just to make you,
Just to watch you BLEED!

I'd give anything, just to cut you free.
I'd give blood, just to make you,
Just to watch you BLEED!

ttfn!



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